On my birthday's eve, I got depressed, humiliated, frustrated, angry, kicked from the computer and cried. Was that even fair? I wont be going anywhere tomorrow. If friends would be coming over then that would be good. Ill just treat myself tomorrow by cooking something that would make me feel better, at least. More likely, a comfort food. *shrugs*
I injured Fernando and I felt really bad about it. The owner of that huge bass got disappointed and told me that it'll be alright for him, but for his sister who paid for it, only God knows. So I was thinking of just buying that guitar from them. I didnt realize I already made numerous scratches on its side bottom which made me more depressed. Damn. I was too careless. ;__;
So my problem now is when I can afford to buy him. Im geddam broke that I cant even buy stuff to prepare for my own birthday. Ugh. This is more frustrating!
My eyes hurts now. It was long time ago since I last cried because I tend to resist the heavy feeling before, I just cant take a hold of it anymore.
Just one good news arrived today. Grandpa would be coming home soon, probably after a month with a laptop! So thats the only thing that makes me feel a little better. Ive always wanted to have one, though, for sure, it wont be just mine, but at least, there's something I can use which is more handy.
But on the other side, Im still scared that he might get disappointed with me not taking the Licensure Exam last June. My friends who took it, made it and they're now registered nurses. Im being left behind - thats another thing that frustrates me now. I thought it would be easier for me to study if Ill have ALOT of time ahead, but yeah.. for the past 4 months, nothing productive happened to me. Im not even opening my book until last night. Damn. Im such a bad student. -_-
Now, Why am I even alive? *sighs*
..raging hormones at its best!
current mood: - Amused
I just cant resist to post this new scans of my (very) good-looking boys. xDDD And Im still the same for them. I mean, my raging hormones wont let me down everytime there's a new stuff about Arisu. Hee!♥
(click the pictures for HUGE-ER size)
Alright, I must go to bed now. Sweet Dreams minna-san! :D